Empowering Children Of Divorce ~ Dr. SueAnne Magyar-Hill

Divorce Tips: When To Stop Texting And Start Talking?

by Dr. SueAnne Magyar-Hill on in Emotions

It’s occurring more and more frequently, and it’s causing a lot of people distress. It’s fast, it’s easy, it’s popular, and it can be all consuming.

It’s texting, and people are using text messaging as a substitution for real conversation and it is causing HUGE challenges in relationships.

Text messages can be VERY misinterpreted, especially during times when emotions and sensitivities are running high like during a divorce.

Texting has become such a popular way of connecting with people, venting, or expressing oneself that for some, normal verbal communication via phone or face to face has become secondary and even uncomfortable. [...]

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Divorce Wars: Are You Putting Your Children In The Middle Of A Social Media Battle?

by Dr. SueAnne Magyar-Hill on in Emotions

Do you ever find yourself tempted to share details of your divorce or your ex on social networking sites?

When emotions run high, in a moment of impulse, it’s easy to hit the SHARE button, but not so easy to pull it back. I want to caution you about having divorce wars online.

Divorce is a private matter and spilling out details of your divorce via social networking online can put your children in the middle of a social media crossfire that could go public.

Many feel an emotional release with all the social networking options available. It’s a tremendous tool, however it’s not the communication tool to discuss your divorce. Issues with divorce and legal matters are private, and need to be discussed in private.

“There are no secrets on the internet.” CAUTION: Although you may think [...]

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Are Text And Phone Battles Putting Your Children In The Middle?

by Dr. SueAnne Magyar-Hill on in Emotions

Let’s talk about confidential conversations.

Do you find yourself walking into your pantry or stepping out on your porch to avoid your children hearing your telephone conversations?

If you do, give yourself a Gold Star!

Phone conversations and text messages can get very personal and you don’t want to put your children in the middle of a conversation where something is said that you can never pull back.

By being conscientious of your chatter, you are protecting your children from worries and concerns.

Especially because [...]

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Divorce Tips: What If You And Your Ex Can’t Afford To Live Apart?

by Dr. SueAnne Magyar-Hill on in Body

So, you’ve gone through all the steps to legally divorce, but now you don’t have the means to physically separate and live in different households?

This is common for a lot of couples today and I’m finding myself in sessions helping them navigate through how to actually continue to emotionally and physically go through the healing process of divorcing and yet still live together.

This can be very confusing for you and your children.

So, what are some divorce tips on how to handle this? [...]

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How Does Divorce Affect Children When You Get Frustrated?

by Dr. SueAnne Magyar-Hill on in Emotions

I wanted to talk today about practicing patience and kindness towards yourself and your children.

You might be feeling short on patience and kindness lately as your emotional fuel tank feels like it’s running low. You may even feel that it’s empty at this point.

Changes with the family require much more time, energy and thought on day to day activities as a family is navigating through divorce. As a result, there are many physical and emotional changes that are occurring.

You might feel that your children are being more needy or clingy. All this is very normal.

Anytime you’re going through physical and emotional changes your senses become more alert. You become more [...]

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Divorce Advice: How Can I Gain More Parenting Time Out Of Each Day?

by Dr. SueAnne Magyar-Hill on in Mind

Are you feeling like you need a few more hours added to your day to get it all done?

Are you wanting some divorce advice on how to get more of that special parenting time with your child, especially since your family is going through a transition, and you’re feeling like you need to connect a little bit more?

Well, you’re not alone. Most people, whether going through a divorce or not, feel over-worked, overwhelmed, and over-committed, and kids lives tend to be just as busy…

In order for there to be a healthy balance and a healthy relationship with your child, [...]

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What Are Some Divorce Tips To Eliminate The Guilt?

by Dr. SueAnne Magyar-Hill on in Emotions

As a Psychologist, a common concern I see amongst parents is what I call Single Parent Guilt.

It comes up often so here are some divorce tips to help you eliminate the guilt.

Parents that are divorced or divorcing frequently tell me they experience feeling heavy, are dragging, and actually feel like they are having a hard time breathing. After ruling out any kind of medical condition, it becomes clear that they are carrying a heavy mental burden and it’s affecting them physically.

Often it’s guilt, and it’s the gift that just… keeps… on… giving…

They think because they chose to divorce that they are ruining their kids, and they have horrible fears in regards to their children having ruined lives because of it.

Let me ask you a question. [...]

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Divorce Tips | Are You Trying To Be A Super-Parent?

by Dr. SueAnne Magyar-Hill on in Spirit

Are you trying to be a Super-Parent… Trying to handle absolutely everything by yourself for you and your child as a result of the divorce?

This can be quite a balancing act, and one that you may be experiencing right now. So here are some divorce tips surrounding trying to be a Super-Parent.

Many of my clients report feeling like a horrible mess of guilt and fear attached to their decision about parting, and one of the responses that can occur is what I call Magical Thinking.

Magical Thinking is when [...]

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What Are The Effects Of Divorce On Children When Friends And Relatives Become Distant?

by Dr. SueAnne Magyar-Hill on in Emotions

A lot of families want to talk to me about boundaries relating to friends, relatives and neighbors after the divorce.

When families divorce, there is a disruption so to speak amongst your circle of friends and family that came with the blending of these relationships through marriage. As a result you may see these people stepping back a bit and distancing themselves.

For the children, this sudden distancing of important figures in their lives is confusing and upsetting. They may even believe they did something to cause that.

Unfortunately, this is one of the effects of divorce on children and it needs to be addressed.

It kind of goes unspoken, but there are a lot of assumptions made by family and friends. They often feel that [...]

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Why Do Children Of Divorced Families Blame Themselves?

by Dr. SueAnne Magyar-Hill on in Emotions

Children will often blame themselves for the divorce.

I know parents would never consciously blame their child for the divorce… So why is it that so many children of divorced families blame themselves for their mother and father splitting up?

I’ve had the opportunity to talk to many kids over the past few decades in my practice and can offer you some insight to this question.

Kids’ ears are like radar. Although it may seem like they are not listening to you or have selective hearing, they are very tuned in. They pick up on what parents are saying and will form a story around that.

It will become their story, and unless you are aware of what their story is you can only guess. You may be surprised to discover that their story is nothing like your story. Their story might be [...]

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